Cuenta una vieja historia,
Ocurrió en un Reino
Lejano de acá.
Cuenta de una Princesa,
Y lindos vestidos.
Un amplio y gran castillo
Brincos y Bufones.
Doncellas, Condesas y nupcias
Todos al ser-vicio
De su gran señor.
Buenos días; pasen ustedes.
Pasen ustedes; buenos días.
Pasen y escuchen,
Escuchen y vean,
Miren y siéntense
Que una historia;
¡Les tenemos que contar!
Puesto que con una canción el principio ya se inició; con una historia, procedemos a seguir:
Procedamos, es mi nombre y Mas Absurdo el de mi acompañante Anónimo. Damos importancia al buen saludar, pues es de mala educación el hacer intromisión sin hacer presentación. Puede dar lugar a confusión.
Y sin contar el tiempo, el cuento no se cuenta. Sin embargo lo que cuenta es el cuento. ¡¡¡Contemos ya!!!:
La protagonista de este cuento es una bella Princesa. Su padre era Rey y su madre, Reina. Ella era hija única y princesa.
Vivian en un gran Castillo, con grandes torres y muchas habitaciones. Habitaciones con grandes camas y muchos armarios a su vez con muchos cajones, llenos de ropa y zapatos.
Juegos, juguetes y patinetes por todas partes.
Pues bien, un día, al acercarse Hora de comer; así se llamaba su asistente, le comunica por el móvil que la mesa estaba preparada.
La princesa se levantó con sus piernas, sus brazos, su cabeza y orejas. Se arregló su traje de seda, con botones de nácar brillante y para sus pies pensó en sus zapatos de gamuza.
Ella dudó entre zapatos de gamuza ó zapatillas de deporte, por que el pasillo que tenía que recorrer medía dos mil pasos.
Al llegar al comedor, ella se sentó en el mismo sitio de siempre, en la misma silla de siempre, la misma mesa, de madera.
Le pusieron delante su plato con sopa y toda la corte se puso a mirar con ansiedad.
Ella, miro el plato, miró a la Corte y suspiró una vez, miró a su madre y suspiró otra vez, miró a su padre y rompió a llorar.
¡Otra vez!. Exclamó el Rey. ¡La Princesa está llorando!
Todos los que estaban allí, al oír al rey decir esto, se pusieron nerviosos y trataban de descubrir el motivo del lloro.
Sabios, médicos, videntes, diplomáticos, sirvientes, brujos y bufones corrían de un lado a otro como si detrás de ellos corriera el mismísimo dragón de siete cabezas y tres colas. Sí.... el rey no soportaba ver a la princesa llorar. Y es por esa regla de tres que todos corrían con los pies.
Recorrieron la distancia de cuatrocientos pasos rápidos y rápidamente un sabio levantó la mano y dijo rápidamente:
¡Ya conozco la razón!
¡OHHHHHH! Exclamó la corte.
¿Dame la razón? Preguntó el Rey.
Y a continuación, todos preguntaban al Mismo Tiempo; así se llamaba este sabio. Mismo Tiempo. Tragó saliva y dijo, llora por que está caliente.
Sin dar paso, el Rey preguntó a la Princesa, que no cesaba de llorar. Hija mía,¿ lloras por calentura, de la sopa?.
La princesa respondió con un ¡NO!. No sin hacer una pausa dramática.
Podemos pasar a la recreación actoral.
¿Llora por que está fría? Preguntó por Deducción al Rey. Por Deducción era el nombre de otro sabio. Preguntémosle a Ella, respondió el Rey, refiriéndose a la cocinera. Mejor, a la Princesa Directamente ¿No os parece? dijo la Reina un tanto alterada.
En ese momento, así se llamaba otro sabio. Preguntó:
¿Está de su gusto?
¡¡¡NO!!! Y lloraba, lloraba, lloraba...
¡Que disgusto! ¡ No está a su gusto!
¿Habrá sido un susto? Dijo un soldado robusto.
El Rey, cambiando la expresión de su busto, dijo: Justo, eso es...
Y Justo en ese momento, la Princesa sin esperar siquiera a que le preguntaran se puso de pataleta.
Un bufón desesperado, al sentir en sus propias carnes las piernas de la Princesa que le pataleaban. Dijo:
Yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo...
No podía salir de esa monotonía palabrerística, pues su tartamudez se lo impedía.
Le bastó un solo bastonazo del Rey, en el suelo, para tranquilizarse y cantar: (A ritmo de Rap).
Humor has de tener
Para la sopa poder comer.
Aquel bufón acabó con el cuerpo magullado y por separado.
La corte vio el corte con corte y decidió tomar cartas en el asunto el valiente caballero Don Din-don. Apodo que le venia por sus patas de campana y patillas cortas. En un alarde de valentía, aseguró que la sopa debía de tomarse en plato de plata y sin platicar. Todos aplaudieron menos el Rey, la Reina y la Princesa, que seguía llorando. El caballero avergonzado por su fracaso, para salir del paso dijo: Ya veo que no me hizo mucho caso.
La princesa no cesaba de llorar. El Rey no cesaba de estar preocupado y de hacer preguntas a la Princesa.
¿Quieres sopa de cebolla?
¿Quieres sopa de ajo?.
¿Quizás sopa cubierta?
¿Sopa de menudillos?.
¿Tal vez sopa de letras?
¿Sopa de fideos?
¿Sopa de tortuga? Aleta de Tiburón? Ancas de rana?....
El Rey se empeñaba en buscar una rápida respuesta, mas solo obtenía la misma respuesta. Lloros de princesa.
Un político comentó que se tendría que concebir un debate para la creación de un referéndum y que el pueblo fuera el que decidiera. Su propuesta fue desestimada por que es sabido que los problemas reales se sirven de soluciones reales.
Un científico, sugirió analizar la sopa...
Un médico, que habría que darle vitaminas...
Nada de nada para nada.
Y fue entonces cuando apareció el anciano. Nadie se percató de su presencia hasta que se situó delante de la princesa. La miró, la escuchó llorar y escuchó a todo el mundo que le abrumaba con su desasosiego.
Que? Que? Que?...
Paciencia. Fue lo que dijo.
Que? Dijo el Rey.
Calma. Repitió el Anciano.
La única palabra que salía de su boca era esta. Hasta que todo quedó en calma y entonces la princesa por fin, dejo de llorar.
El anciano le miró a los ojos y le preguntó:
¿Qué te ocurre?
La Princesa respondió: ¡Que no tengo cuchara!.
El sabio se despidió no sin antes dar su reflexión, claro está como todo buen sabio:
SI SABEMOS ESPERAR, TODO SE HA DE REVELAR.
CON PACIENCIA TODO SE TERMINA SABIENDO.
SER PACIENTE, NO ES ESTAR ENFERMO.
SABER ESPERAR Y NO DES-ESPERAR.
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